What's new and on my mind....

1. Impromptugirl is the main focus these days - some days her behavior is almost respectful. I wish I knew what to do... which is why we've started counseling. I am praying that things will improve, although I know it will be slow progress. But right now I am feeling very scared about everything. It of course effects our marriage too.

2. Still feeling broke - however with resigning from the temple, only 3 more ortho payments, plus bonus hopefully next month and a promotion I am hoping to put a dent in the credit cards. Unfortunately we've had to use them some lately - especially the one that isn't near the limit at all. I have been selling some on half.com and eBay, but it's not enough to make much of a dent (maybe a meal at Mickey D's or breakfast at Dunkin Donuts).

3. Some days it feels like I have no friends. Makes me very jealous of Impromptugirl who can do it at the drop of a hat. I never "got" being a teen when I was one so how am I supposed to handle raising one?

4. Dh is heading towards the last week of being very very busy and will be down to just 1 show shortly. It will free up his weekdays. And with my increased leave time (yahoo!) I can take more time off this summer too.

And the week ends with another weird and sad note

Billy Mays is reported as having died today. His wife found him - probably a heart attack.

Very sad and also another contemporary of mine as far as age.

It's been a strange, tragic, weird week

First, it started with the Metro train accident - how horrible that has been and it just shows why the Federal Government needs to get out of DC's business.

Then, the almost simultaneous deaths of Ed McMahon, Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. It is a blessing that Farrah passed - she had suffered long enough. I just fear that Ryan O'Neal will retreat back into the bottle never to come out again.

As for Michael Jackson - I had heard last month that he was hospitalized so it seemed like he was on the rapid decline. However, this was rather sudden. What a weird life he had!

Several observations

1. Bumper sticker I've seen around a little bit - "Don't Blame Me, I Voted for Sarah!" Say what? Um, aren't you the morons who got us in this mess in the first place?
2. Why does it have to be so hard to find a therapist for Impromptugirl? I asked one of the partners of our old therapist for a couple of names. He thought they were part of our insurance group but as it turned out they're not. We went for an initial consult, and I also brought a printout of names in the network. They did recommend about 10 of them. I also called our old therapist who is getting somebody for her dd but I have no idea if they are part of our plan either. I hate cold-calling, am somewhat phone phobic to start with and it just bites. I know other people go through the same thing but for me it seems especially hard.

WHFS-lite?

1. After what was left of WHFS radio (from 104.7) was cut into pieces, stuffed into a garbage bag and then thrown out of an airplane, it didn't seem there was much left for us alternative rock types in the DC area. However, I had heard and it's true that the only "heir" is WRNR. WRNR is an Annapolis-based station which makes me think perhaps it's in the old HFS headquarters? The program manager and main DJ there is Bob Waugh, who was at WHFS "back in the day". Also Rob Timm is another DJ who was there too. It is nice to hear an old familiar voice, since I miss Weasel and Cerphe so much. I just hope they are doing well. I do see what Schelby is doing through Facebook but she was a newbie and is back in California where she belongs.

2. Another observation on Impromptugirl. After 2 weekends where the main focus of her time was spent with what I think are better friends than what was her BFF her behavior has improved tremendously. The attitude is slowly coming along too but but it is keeping her accountable for letting us know where she is and who she's with. This year has been her first taste of real freedom with us letting her go out by herself so in some ways it's natural that she maybe got a little drunk on it. We babyboomers were always allowed to roam the neighborhoods ourselves - even my overprotective mother let me do that as long as she knew who I was with. But since Impromptugirl wasn't allowed to do it until last year it has been a bit of an adjustment. As for her BFF, I think she is beginning to realize how exhausting it can be to be around her - while it can be fun her BFF is very high-maintenance and seems to have a knack for getting herself in trouble at the drop of a hat. The friend has already been in detention numerous times, and got herself suspended 2 weeks ago for 3 days. I can't imagine me ever having done that, and my daughter frankly can't either. As Impromptugirl says, she has better things to do with her time and she also thinks skipping school is stupid too. As a matter of fact, I was happy to know that at least the school secretary there thought well of her. So perhaps she will end up with a decent report card for 4th quarter too.

Book review and other stuff

I finally got around to reading "The Year of Magical Thinking" by Joan Didion. I've always read rave reviews about it and her descriptions of grief and denial the year after her husband just dropped dead of a heart attack before dinner. To compound that her daughter was already in the hospital with an acute staph infection and pneumonia, and ended up dying from complications 18 months later (although her passing is not in the book). It is all very sad and it is interesting to read it from the perspective of somebody who is rich and famous and leads a very charmed life suddenly get a piano dropped from the sky onto her head. From the photos of her, grief has taken its toll and I am sure she is spending these years feeling lonely. I hope she finds some comfort in her friends and extended family.

In other news:

1. I waver from despair through hope that Impromptugirl will start changing her attitude and actions. She does seem to have made a new friend who is much less into the bad scene than some of the others. I still can't get her to do any outside activities but that will be coming. I am looking into counseling for all of us and hope to get her into some sort of peer group with positive reinforcement.
2. The sun is actually out today!
3. I was going to do a yard sale this morning, but I was too depressed to get my act together on it. Besides, the ground is still so saturated I figured it wouldn't be much fun standing out there when it is like that. Hopefully next weekend.
4. My sinus infection is much much better - as long as I get some sleep.
5. Maxdog is still the greatest creature in the universe and will always be.

I hate this kind of cold

I caught my daughter's cold, and at first it looked like it wasn't going to be as bad but it actually has gotten that way. And I overdid it yesterday so I'm paying for it now.

It's a chest cold and I'm coughing lots. But the worst part is that I'm feeling pretty tired, but not tired enough to just sleep the day away but I don't have energy for much more than sitting around watching TV. The lawn needs mowing - no way. The windows need cleaning and I was going to do other spring cleaning chores - nope not today. And of course I'll be much better for work tomorrow.

Oh and our A/C decided to stop working yesterday. It blows air but the compressor doesn't turn on so it's not too effective. I just hope it can be repaired quickly (by Tuesday as the high will be 89) and not too expensive (fat chance on that one...):-(